李艳华：新东方优秀的写作老师之一。博士生在读。言语平实，内容详尽，逻辑清晰，简洁实用，经验丰富，教学成绩显著。

　　Dear accommodation officer:

　　I’m Lily, a sophomore in our university majoring in French. I’m writing to you because I want to ask your help (删)for changing for a new single room in next semester.

　　As for the reasons why I’d like to change my room, there’re the following points. Now I share the room with another girl. I find that living with someone else is not as pleasant as it seemed to me before, for I can’t keep (enjoy)my privacy and do things freely as I’ve (had) hoped for. Moreover, she always has friends visiting, which makes it hard for me to concentrate on my work and even to have a good rest. Last but not the least, as I want to receive (pursue) the (post)graduate education after graduation, I should prepare for the examination with a great deal of concentration from now on.

　　So I’d like to live in a single room next year. I appreciate it very much if you would help me.

　　Best

　　Wishes

　　Yours sincerely

　　Lily

　　句子结构不错，内容也尚可，逻辑分明。
　　December 23,2008

　　To Accommodation Officer:

　　I am sorry to trouble you. But i serious have no idea. (for it seems I have no other choices but to write to you for help)

　　I wants to change a room next term, because my roomate always has friends visiting.when

　　I looked the book that they was deeply affected me so I can't serious studise.(Almost every time I read ,I am greatly bothered by them, making me hardly concentrate on my study )If somebody noise nearly me When i am looking the book that i would very angry.(what is the worse is that when I am bothered I am easy to be lost in great depression and even anger.)

　　I would be take part in the examination for the graduate student.( Also, I will attend the entrance exam for the postgraduate , which requires a quiet surroundings for me to study well and rest well.)therefor i want (to ) live only myself (so) that i can put all myself into the studies. I am very need a room to study. Can you help me?

　　Expecting you answer!

　　yours

　　recebcca

　　句子错误较多，内容表达不清，尚需努力。
 
　　November 28, 2008

　　Room 205, Building 3

　　Dear Sir/Madam

　　My name is xiao ming. I am a student majored in economy.

　　There is a problem about the room which I and another student live in. As we seen(as we can see), the environment where we live is very good, (with)big room, comfortable bed, telephone and so on. But the student--my roommate, he (删)always has friends visiting. That makes me very difficult (it difficult for me)to work and have a rest. At the same time, my money and computer will be unsafe.

　　So i hope that you can supply a new room for me next term. I hope the room is a single room, so i can work well and have a good rest. Of course, i can pay the money double.

　　I'm looking forward (to )your answer.

　　With many thanks

　　xiao ming

　　注意基本的搭配用法。
　　Dear Accommodation Officer:

　　I'm a college student in grade 2 and I ask for your permission to allow me to change (for)a single room next term.

　　I have already thought about it for a long time and I really couldn't live with my roommate.He is an outgoing boy who likes to make friends with others.I think it's a good behavior except for one thing that his friends always visit our room.What's more ,not only (do)they play loudly in the day ,but also they make noise at night.The phenomenon has disturbed me seriously.I have to (,making me )sleep very late so that I feel exhausted in the class.

　　Although I have communicated with him many times but it doesn't work.However,I feel we have a poor relation ship.Thus,in my opnion, can be solved only in this way (the only way to solve this is to change for another room).Thanks for (your)receiving my letter and I'm looking forward to your reply.

　　Best wishes